Saturday, February 18, 2017

Today, I fell.

This morning, I woke up and couldn't get back to sleep, so I went downstairs to the workout room to run on the treadmill at the hotel. I hate treadmills. But it was convenient and efficient so I figured I would give it a whirl.
Turns out, it gave me a whirl. Two minutes in, my head phones got tangled. I reached for my phone. It fell, I missed a step and it all ended in a big messy pile. (Me.)
There was nothing I could do. It was like I stepped out of my body for a minute and I watched it happen, totally and completely helpless. Of course the room was packed. (Please feel free to take a second and laugh at the visual--I am, now.)
Every single person in the room stopped their own machines to come help me--collectively restoring my faith in humanity. 
I picked myself up and thanked everyone, assuring them I was (mostly) ok. I got back on the treadmill and started running again. I'm not going to lie, it hurt like hell. But I thought about my 8yo figure skater, who bravely has to get back up every time she falls on the ice. My knees are both skinned, my shins are scraped and bruised and I have some weird rubber-burn on the side of my leg that I can't even describe. And I probably don't have to tell you about my damaged pride. But...I got back up. 
I won't know if I see any of those people today, my mind has kindly blocked out their faces. But if they see me, I don't want them to think, "There's the girl that fell." I want them to think, "There goes the girl that got back up." 
We all fall. But it's the getting back up part that matters.

Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Internet Monsters: Fear

There are at least two scary monsters lurking on the internet. One is the Green-Eyed Monster (more commonly known as Jealousy) and it likes to attack writers. For a blog post about that, click here. The other one is Fear.

Fear can be a vicious, hungry beast. It can't be fed fast enough. And when it's fed, it has the potential to grow and grow exponentially, overcoming and overtaking everything in its destructive path. This kind of fear especially likes to lurk on the internet.

In the early days of email and the internet, fear crept up in those emails. Do you remember? The ones that your retired uncle liked to forward to every single person in his contact list.  As the internet evolved, so did Internet Fear. Now it revels in "shares" on social media pages. Its hope and dream is to become a viral sensation.

We used to be able to rely on journalist integrity. It was actually a thing. Journalists and reporters were trained in finding multiple source support and finding and getting sources to go on the record. Remember the movie All the President's Men? It was like that.

But our world, and our news, has evolved. In the rush to be the first to post information, that integrity can't help but suffer. The larger outlets, and the more solid sources, manage this easily by constantly updating their stories. They've evolved from print to online formats, and I like to believe their integrity has evolved at the same pace.

However, it's so easy to forget that we can't always rely on journalist reporting in the same way we once could. It's so easy to forget, that not every source is legitimate, not everything you read is true. As a result,  sometimes we are baited into  reposting stuff that sounds like the truth, when maybe, just maybe, it isn't. Internet Fear LOVES when that happens. It jumps up and down and claps its hands shouting, "Yay!"

We've all seen THOSE posts. The ones that sound true on purpose and the first initial reaction upon reading it is, "OMG, that's terrible!"

This is slightly conspiracy theorist of me, but what if some of those posts came from people or groups that WANT us to be afraid? What if, those posts come from someone who knows how to manipulate fear to do exactly what they want, because they know that fear has an insatiable appetite?

Let's suppose I wasn't such a solid upstanding citizen, and I had a bone to pick with a company about something. Or maybe even say, I was a competitor of that company. Or maybe even, I believe I'm fighting the "good" fight and I want everyone else to be afraid enough to fight it with me -- it wouldn't be hard to establish an official sounding website and write a scathing report filled with lots of fearful accusations, designed to induce fear. Post it in a few social media outlets and viola! That kind of stuff goes viral in minutes and the target company takes a hit. Sometimes a big one.

If only, there was somewhere we could go. Some, universal place we could check out suspicious sounding reports to verify their accuracy before we fall into that trap so delicately laid by that ferocious Internet Fear beast. Oh, wait....there is!

If you have never heard of snopes.com, it's time to check it out. Snopes is a non-partisan website,  dedicated to verifying internet rumors. They collect rumors and reports, and research them. They verify sources and they stamp it with a result: True, False or Combination. I love it.

I love it because when I read a Facebook post that shares a mother's status that her little girl has been snatched out of a shopping cart by an evil kidnapping ring that lurks in Walmart pretending to be social workers, I can go to Snopes and read with my own eyes that it's not true. Whew. I didn't think our world was that terrible.

In this day and age, it's healthy to harbor a small dose of conspiracy theorist - it means we are thinking for ourselves and not succumbing blindly to the fear. When that little voice inside says, "that's too terrible to be true," maybe, just maybe, that little voice is right.

Call me optimistic - but never naive - for believing in the best of our world. And it doesn't mean that there isn't a time and a place for fear: It warns us of danger and can bring positive change. (Cue the drama over Donald Trump...but that's a post for a different day). For now, maybe, if we are all careful not to  succumb to Internet Fear blindly, this world won't seem like such a scary place, and that will ultimately make it better.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

I Don't Live Under A Rock

Yesterday, the hashtag #RIPBlog was trending and the conversation was about how the blog format is dying. Today, I started a new one. A little counter-intuitive don't you think?

I don't care. I have a voice and things to say.

I've been noticing that social media has been especially dark and judgmental lately. I've been given the gift of words. If my words, can somehow shine a light through some of that darkness and provide a little bit of hope where there is fear, I've got to use that light.

*Sigh* But I'm just too organized. All of my other blogs are so topic specific, there was no appropriate place to post general thoughts and random observations. So here you go. New blog. Yay! (She said, with sarcasm dripping from her voice and a roll of her eyeballs.) Because I don't already have enough to do...

And I swear, I'm not doing this because I'm trying to procrastinate. Sure, I might only be 200 pages into a 600 page manuscript review for a client. Yes, I said 600 pages. *cough/choke* Seriously, writers, word count recommendations for various genres exist for a reason. Check them BEFORE you write 600 pages. But I digress and that's a topic for a different blog.

Back to the reason I'm not procrastinating. The other day, I was accused -- by someone whom I've never met -- of living under a rock. I will spare you the details, but it was in a comment on a Facebook post, and it was with respect to the whole Target-Restroom-Transgender-Controversy. I dared to share a personal experience from Belgium (I used to live there) that happened to illustrate disagreement with another comment, and bam. I was told I lived under a rock. I should note here that I'm not offended in any way by this, now.

If there is one thing I've grown over the past several years, it's a thick skin. There were a whole bunch of years when I was trying to find an agent where I collected more rejection letters than my brothers had baseball cards in their combined set. But also, when you are flying your freak flag as high as I'm flying mine, you just have to stop worrying about what anyone else thinks.

But I admit, at first the judgmental comment caught me off guard. There was that whole, "someone doesn't like me moment" of insecurity, but now I'm laughing about it. Seriously. Anyone who knows me even a little bit, knows that I hardly live under a rock. Some days, you can find me in a dark creepy basement...or a haunted attic, but never, ever under a rock. I HATE bugs.

But it got me thinking. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Our country was founded on different opinions. Facebook is an amazing tool for expressing such opinions, as long as we do so respectfully. And then I got thinking about how I've seen a lot of darkness, judgment and disrespect lately. And "Voila!" Here you go, new blog with the sole purpose of counteracting that darkness and fear.

I have A LOT going on in my head at any given moment. I'm finishing edits on a book that NEEDS to get written (I've been working on it for awhile.) I'm developing concepts for two others, and I've already got other blogs, not to mention my freelance clients. (Oh boy...just got overwhelmed for a second...hang on while I take a deep breath...Ok, we're good.) Don't expect blog posts every day, or even every week, but here's a glimpse at some potential topics that are already swirling around in my crazy head: Why I'm Not Afraid of Unisex Bathrooms; Why Snopes.com is the Best Website Ever; and Why I'm Not Afraid of Ghosts (although, that one might need to go on the other blog)....

But this is important. I want to turn on a light that, hopefully, offers a little hope and faith. This world isn't terrible, it's amazing...and every day it gets better. I promise to use my voice to promote the good. At any point, please feel free to disagree...as long as you do so respectfully.